DON'T LET THE BITCHES GET YOU DOWN.

I pick the worst people. People that are too far, too crazy, too unfaithful (any kind of unfaithful is bad enough), or too taken or some shit like that. I try not to take it too seriously anyways, because I'm only fucking seventeen but I have horrible luck thus far. Anyways, I always knew that the boy I've been talking to mainly has friends that are girls and that bothered me even though we were never going to be anything serious. But I got over it after a while because I figured my jealousy was just completely unnecessary. They're just friends or whatever and I hardly have any girls for friends so it's the same thing when people date me. But it bothered me because even though I didn't want to, I like him. Liked, sort of. I just don't want to waste my time on any bullshit anymore and I'm going to pull out (lolz) at the first sign of red-flagged bullshitedness.

His ex-girlfriend is always around and they're always hanging out, but I hang out with some of my ex-boyfriends so I didn't think anything of it. If they wanted to be dating, they would still be. But then I saw a picture of her kissing his cheek and I was over going out with him this Saturday. It could just be a friendly thing, but c'mon. I don't know if I'm reading too much into it or not. But I found out he basically does all the same shit with all these girls that he does with me. Calling and videos and shit and it made me feel stupid. I don't know if he's saying the same things to them as he says to me but he's a douchey teenage boy. Isn't that what they do? There's always the possibility that it's in my head, though, because in a lot of my relationships I get cheated on amongst other shit.

I'm considering going just to get my own personal fill, but I really think I'm just going to tell him I don't want to go out anymore. And fuck giving him the mix, that's stupid. I'll save it for someone better. I don't know. I know we won't amount to anything so it shouldn't really matter, but why waste my time at all? I can't tell if I'm being irrational or not, but I feel like even thinking about it is a waste of time. So, fuck it. I hope he has fun in college, because I know I'm going to eventually.